A few lessons on Christianity, from being married to a pregnant woman.
1) "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" can be paraphrased "if you do not want to have your belly rubbed without permission, do not rub other people's bellies without asking first"
2) After picking up extra chores around the house, sometimes I feel like the Good Samaritan, stopping to help someone beside the road. Then I remember that my wife is providing sustenance to a helpless baby all the time, and I get a better sense of what it means to really be self sacrificing.
3) Paul uses the image of creation groaning like a woman in labor in Romans 8:22. Watching a pregnancy gives a new understanding of the already/not yet-it's possible to be very ready for something to be over with, and also understand that it is an amazing journey, and that the time is not yet nigh.
4) Pregnancy makes it clear what it means to be part of an intentional community of accountability. It means everyone asks about gender, names, diaper choices, and how you are feeling all the time. You can either be frustrated and grumpy about the invasion of privacy, or you can embrace it as a sign of love, compassion, and faithfulness.
5) It is much easier to ask "how is it going" with sincerity when someone is pregnant. It makes me notice how hard it is to remember to check in with the people with less visible joys and concerns when they haven't announced it in church that week. Some percentage of our failure to care is just our failure to remember.
6) Although-it is easier to ask "how is the pregnancy going" than "how are you managing your depression this week?"
7) Pregnancy is like conversion-to have a new child is to welcome with open arms the end of your life. When he is born, we too are going to be born again.
8) Another parallel between pregnancy and conversion-there is a lot of social science research suggesting that pregnancy does not make you happier (see here: pro or con). It doesn't necessarily make you unhappier, but you shouldn't have a baby for self interested reasons-rather, I think, it is one of the more selfless things you can do. Same with joining the church-you're signing up to love your enemies, to give without expecting return, to visit the sick, the prisoners, and the widows. There should be more joy, but it won't be easier.
9) You know Zechariah? John's dad, who was struck dumb at the news that his wife was pregnant with John the Baptist? Yeah, maybe he just knew enough to keep his mouth shut.
10) To have a little human being inside you is to know breathtaking vulnerability. It is one thing to say "consider the lilies" when you are single, or even married. I am not yet sure what it means to not worry about what he wears when I consider this little one.
I'm sure you have your own-add them!
1) "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" can be paraphrased "if you do not want to have your belly rubbed without permission, do not rub other people's bellies without asking first"
2) After picking up extra chores around the house, sometimes I feel like the Good Samaritan, stopping to help someone beside the road. Then I remember that my wife is providing sustenance to a helpless baby all the time, and I get a better sense of what it means to really be self sacrificing.
3) Paul uses the image of creation groaning like a woman in labor in Romans 8:22. Watching a pregnancy gives a new understanding of the already/not yet-it's possible to be very ready for something to be over with, and also understand that it is an amazing journey, and that the time is not yet nigh.
4) Pregnancy makes it clear what it means to be part of an intentional community of accountability. It means everyone asks about gender, names, diaper choices, and how you are feeling all the time. You can either be frustrated and grumpy about the invasion of privacy, or you can embrace it as a sign of love, compassion, and faithfulness.
5) It is much easier to ask "how is it going" with sincerity when someone is pregnant. It makes me notice how hard it is to remember to check in with the people with less visible joys and concerns when they haven't announced it in church that week. Some percentage of our failure to care is just our failure to remember.
6) Although-it is easier to ask "how is the pregnancy going" than "how are you managing your depression this week?"
7) Pregnancy is like conversion-to have a new child is to welcome with open arms the end of your life. When he is born, we too are going to be born again.
8) Another parallel between pregnancy and conversion-there is a lot of social science research suggesting that pregnancy does not make you happier (see here: pro or con). It doesn't necessarily make you unhappier, but you shouldn't have a baby for self interested reasons-rather, I think, it is one of the more selfless things you can do. Same with joining the church-you're signing up to love your enemies, to give without expecting return, to visit the sick, the prisoners, and the widows. There should be more joy, but it won't be easier.
9) You know Zechariah? John's dad, who was struck dumb at the news that his wife was pregnant with John the Baptist? Yeah, maybe he just knew enough to keep his mouth shut.
10) To have a little human being inside you is to know breathtaking vulnerability. It is one thing to say "consider the lilies" when you are single, or even married. I am not yet sure what it means to not worry about what he wears when I consider this little one.
I'm sure you have your own-add them!
With the "is this labor, is it not?" I'm finding myself thinking of the Matthew passage "are you the one we've been waiting for, or should we look somewhere else?" This/you seem(s) like something/one different, but I've never been here before. Are you it? Or is there more to come?
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